I’ve had a complicated relationship with beauty throughout my life. It started at seven years-old when I looked in the mirror at ballet class and decided that I was not beautiful. That day started an emotional, mental and physical battle that lasted for years. The battled included eating disorders and depression that followed the same path. In my late twenties, after years of work, I felt the battle subside and I experienced a level of internal peace. I learned to quiet the negative voice that rattled off my physical flaws and looking in the mirror no longer set off a tidal wave of panic. My healing process included setting rules intended to stop external influences from violating my inner peace. I decided that beauty, the desire to be beautiful, was an external influence. In my world, beauty was about judgement and I had no desire to be judged.
It wasn’t until my forties that I discovered the unintended consequence of my quest for peace. It’s fair to say that I had my personal world view rocked and believe it or not it all happened when I put on a pink wig at party. As soon as I put on that feathery ‘do on my head I was transformed…I did not walk around the party, I sashayed! I spent days trying to figure out what happened to me that night. After much contemplation, I realized I had felt unapologetically capital “B” Beautiful. BOOM! Mind blown; life changed.
I believe that Beauty is a powerful universal force and that we are all innately beautiful. I know every woman deserves to see and feel her Beauty. That’s what Woman In Disguise is about. It’s about giving ourselves permission to play, explore and create to rediscover that we are Beautiful.